Sports Nudity – What does your contract say?

I notice that Huffington Post has slotted this amusing youtube video of Oakland Raiders lineman losing his pants onto their front page this morning.

Now, I’m not sure if Mr Thomas has a clause in his contract covering the uncovering of  his nether regions. Probably not.

And you’d suspect the league would be rather keen for gridiron’s, somewhat hefty, participants to keep their trousers on as they puff around the park given the sport’s fanbase is largely comprised of even heftier trousered individuals drinking beer.

This, apparently, is not the case should you be a player for, the slightly odd offshoot of gridiron, the Lingerie Bowl.

Those aren't regulation knickers! Gerremoff!

The Smoking Gun website has revealed Lingerie Bowl “founder” and ex-Blind Date contestant, Mitchell Mortaza, is becoming increasingly litigious with “ex-players” who have raised fairly standard questions over health coverage and wages. The loathsome-sounding Mortaza had his lawyers fire off a stream of letters threatening legal action over the women, who have posted critical comments on Facebook and MySpace pages.

To one player, who complained of the league’s “disorganised practices, he wrote…

Let me give you a little advice and this goes for any other player creating unnecessary, drama. Simply SHUT UP and play football…

Other e-mails threatened to report an “ex-player” to the Chicago Police over a “uniform” she didn’t return.

 And it is the “uniforms” and the clauses in the player’s contracts that have given this story an element of high farce. Here’s what the Lingerie Bowl contract has to say about wearing any non-league-approved apparel.

Player shall not wear any additional garments under wardrobe provided by Producer without prior written consent from Producer. Player shall be fined a total of FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS ($500) per occurrence.

And why would Mr Mortaza and his League want to make sure no “additional garments” are worn under a player’s “wardrobe”?

Ah, here’s the relevant clause here…

NUDITY: Player has been advised and hereby acknowledges that Player’s participation in the Event and the related practice sessions and the Player’s services and performances hereunder may involve accidental nudity. In light of the foregoing, Player knowingly and voluntarily agrees to provide Player’s services hereunder and has no objection to providing Player’s services involving accidental nudity.

So, if it hadn’t seemed obvious to anyone from the get go, Lingerie Bowl is an attempt to provide hefty, beer drinking, trousered individuals with the chance of a bit of accidental nudity. It’s even written into the contract!! You wonder why anyone would even bother watching, given we live in a world where non-accidental nudity is, let’s face it, pretty readily available.

And it seems that not many viewers are that bothered. Having been a relatively successful annual pay-per-view event filling the accidental nudity prone half-time slot during the Super Bowl, the Lingerie Bowl expanded this year to a full blown 10-team league. The hype was substantial, the attendances are not and the venture appears to be heading toward a well-earned financial catastrophe.


Mitchell Mortaza; Visionary or Prince of Tools?

PR disasters such as an “alcohol related incident” involving underage members of the Chicago Bliss team haven’t helped the situation. The debonair Mortaza reacted to the news with typical restraint, castigating team manager Keith Hac and his players for behaving like “irresponsible children”. He added…

Stop acting like a bunch of Chicago Bliss tee-shirt wearing bimbos when the liquor starts flowing

The competition is hoping to survive until the Lingerie Bowl on February 7th 2010, still sharing the date with its NFL inspiration. Like many sports, it’s the off-field dramas which are beginning to become the best bit…

Thanks to sportsBYbrooks for the nifty tri-photo.

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