Right-Wing News Host in Pork Stir Fry

In Health News, apparently the gazelle-like Neil Cavuto has raised doubts about Obama’s pick for Surgeon-General, Dr Regina Benjamin, saying she is “too fat” for the post.

The whippet-thin Cavuto, concerned about the message her appointment would send to a country in the pudgy-fingered grip of a deadly Obesity Epidemic™, therefore raised a bony arm in protest.

The svelte Cavuto wearing his "babe magnet" tie

The svelte Cavuto wearing his "babe magnet" tie

Sensing a punch up, I naturally raced to the fridge to grab a frosty brew and settled down to watch the rest of the media pack tear chunks off Dr Benjamin’s blubbery hide.

Imagine my dismay then, when I discovered that Dr Regina Benjamin did not actually practise medicine from a specially reinforced bed and could onlymake it to the White House  with the help of 8 firefighters and a fork lift truck but, in fact, looked like this:

Cough please

Cough please

Granted, she’s not going to be the one in the group who gets asked to wriggle out through the tiny crack after a cave in to go and fetch help. But it’s also not as though bearded men in souwesters are following her down the street hefting a harpoon in their throwing arms, is it?

However, waddling to the good doctor’s defence has immediately is the National Association To Advance Fat Acceptance, saying, “It’s good to know that even doctors struggle with their weight — and lead full and active lives in spite of adversity”

Perhaps Dr Benjamin appreciates the help of NATAFA, a body that has been fighting discrimination from the office it has shared with the Ginger Headed Pride League since 1969?

Perhaps she needed the support of a group that told her, and the rest of the world, “It’s good that you are fat” rather than carrying on thinking she was fairly average and  just a little bloated this month.

But I suspect she simply wished to ignore Neil Cavuto, secure in the knowledge that anyone paying attention to his brand of sneering, self-righteous bigotry would be automatically beneath contempt themselves.

Unfortunately for her, she never got the chance.

On the bright side, however, a tub of chocolate-chip ice cream and a soppy movie can always cheer a girl up.


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